Now the title of this post could refer to one of two things... the heat wave currently making Nebraska slightly unbearable by late afternoon, or the fact that I have completely and totally rocked my workouts this week! Actually, the two are kind of related. But let me back up... first I am going to share a bit of why I am feeling so proud of this week.
So, there really is no way to succinctly share what has been going on, because it is just the latest chapter in a looong story. Besides, I have always maintained that I will be totally honest here, but within the realm of telling my own story. Some details are not mine to share. Wow, talk about a build-up, lol. So anyways, this past Monday my sister moved 7 hours away from us, taking with here some of my nieces and nephews. I have mentioned before that Matt and I were foster parents to two of them for a while, and then the third is little girl-A... Aiden's bff cousin who you see pics of all the time. Without going into the whole ordeal, let me just say that it has been very hard to deal with. Both the dread of knowing they were leaving, and the actual process of saying goodbye. There aren't really words to express how much my heart is hurting right now. There have been times this week when the pain was just overwhelming, both for me and especially for my Mom, who has lived with them for several years and now has a much quiter home reminding her they are gone. I still have some photos of our last weekend together waiting to be shared, but haven't been able to go through them yet. I know everything will work out, and that God is in control, but they were such a part of our daily life that it will take some time to adjust.
During the time leading up to their move, I was so focused on spending as much time with the kids as possible before they left that my priorities really slipped. So naturally I was worried about how I would handle things after they left. I am so excited to share that I am not only back on track, but doing better than ever. With a lot of prayer and some serious determination I have stepped up my workouts this week and am feeling so strong. I have burned crazy calories 5 days this week (Friday other than shopping I took the day off because of a stomach bug) and finally get through my current circuit training with weights without wanting to puke. I have been breaking my workouts up between walking outdoors in the early morning with Aiden (been having to wake him up early due to heat advisory to get our walk in) and then DVDs in the afternoons. The other day I did a little check on my walking history, and realized I have improved my pace when I am out pushing the stroller by 4 minutes per mile in the past three months. While I am still frustrated at times by the lack of physical changes, I feel amazing.
So anyways, I guess this is a good reminder that every change can inspire good things, no matter how hard it may be. It is exciting for me to see myself choosing to turn to exercise instead of food (or sleep!) when I am down. Also, focusing back on my quiet time and letting God shoulder my burdens is always the right choice as well. I am so blessed to have some amazing friends praying me through and supporting me with just the right words when I need them. So often there is one of two songs running through my mind at any given time... Borrow Mine (definitely an all-time favorite of mine) by Bebo Norman or Life is Hard but God is Good (talk about old school! lol) by Pam Thum. It is probably not a coincidence that this time has also brought me back to my blog. Writing has always been my therapy, and I love having a home for that writing... even if it occassionally gathers a little dust!
Saturday, July 21