There is something about the beginning of autumn that makes me want to blog. It happens every year. However, for the past two years I have just not been in a place to make it happen. So I look back at this space where I used to love sharing about my life and I find myself wondering...

How can I move forward here?

So much has happened in the course of two (almost 3?) years. I was diagnosed with cPTSD and started EMDR therapy. We moved... twice. The second move brought us over 500 miles and was anything but smooth. We were without a home of our own for 3 months. Matt has changed employers twice. Aiden has grown in the most amazing ways. Homeschool has been one of my greatest joys... but also a significant challenge during all of the chaos. I have dealt with serious health struggles with my mom and injuries of my own. At the start of this year we walked through losing Matt's father, and lost a couple dear friends shortly after that. It just seems like so much has happened that has changed me completely that it would be strange to just pick up and start blogging again as if no time had passed. 

And yet, this is just more of my story. While I feel like I am not even the same person anymore sometimes, the truth is that I value every part of the journey that has brought me to this point. Sometimes I find myself grieving the fact that I have been away from writing and recording memories for so long. I look back at the blog posts here, and I find that it is just amazing to see where I have come from. I see how much joy there was, even in the hard times, and I don't want the gap in memories to grow any wider. So, I will start writing again. Even if it feels a little weird. Maybe someday it won't anymore. 

Perhaps I can go back and fill in some of the gaps along the way. While I haven't blogged during the time away, I have kept journals and a private instagram account. I also reopened my public instagram at the start of this year. However, I find that I take significantly fewer photos now. I laugh sometimes at how Aiden will have thousands (an unmanageable number, really) of photos from the first 7 years of his life and then suddenly there are a lot less. A LOT less. My thoughts on things like photos have changed a bit. I actually wish sometimes I had taken fewer photos in those earlier years.  That is a post for another day, though. 

Anyhow, I have no idea if anyone will even see these posts for now. Most of my social media died when I abandoned things at the start of 2017. I am mostly just wanting to record life again, but I wouldn't mind reconnecting with some of the amazing people that made my life special back in the "good old days" of blogging. I guess I will just see where this takes me. No matter what, it feels really good to be getting ready to hit publish here. Really good. 

Almost 3 years later...

Saturday, October 12

I feel like I write a lot about living seasonally - although maybe it is more in my own journal than on the blog. If there is one thing I have learned since becoming a mother, it is that seasons change more often than the four seasons of the year we are all used to. Learning to embrace each season as it comes has been huge for me. It isn't always easy to recognize the changes. Often we refuse to believe it is really winter until we find ourselves scraping ice off the windshield. In the same way, I still regularly resist change until I cannot any longer.

A Season of Rest in God's Word

Tuesday, February 7

Week 5 - The Week of "Almost..."

I have been sick for the past 3 days. The kind of sick where all you can do is lay in bed with an ice pack on your head and alternate between reading and sleeping. If I didn't have to feel incredibly awful while doing it, that doesn't actually sound half bad, ha! But I would very much like to trade doing my daily work for feeling like I had been run over by a truck. Today I am better-ish... better enough to sit up at the computer, but so dang-darn wrung out that this paragraph has exhausted me.

2017 - Chapter 5/52

Sunday, February 5

Anyone who follows me on instagram ( or anywhere else) is probably used to seeing photos of Aiden reading. This isn't just because that is when he is always sitting still enough giving me a moment to breathe and snap a pic. It is because he really reads THAT much. This kid loves his books, and I love that he loves them. I have been asked several times how we approached teaching him to read, and my answer is always the same: we didn't. Reading was just something that came naturally to our child. He is truly self-taught. 

Bookworm Tendencies - Reflections on Raising an Avid Reader

Wednesday, February 1

Chapter 4 - The week we made Sabbath a priority

Strangely, I am not feeling particularly wordy today. Maybe I haven't had enough coffee yet this morning, but I am just kinda enjoying the quite and trying to figure out what this day is going to look like. Sometimes that makes it hard to focus on the past week. However, if I don't write this now I might very well not have time to later. 

2017 - Chapter 4/52

Monday, January 30

Last week's menu plan was an overall success. The spicy tuna wraps were super yummy, and the jambalaya I could eat every night. It definitely got us eating better food, and saved money! It wasn't perfect... we still haven't tried the salmon salad pita pockets, and there was one night when I just left everyone to find their own food, ha!... but it helped for sure.

Menu Plan Monday - January 30, 2017